Thankful!

Early Tuesday morning my Dad passed away in his sleep. It was the exit he would have wanted. From the moment I received the call from my sister an overwhelming sense of thankfulness began filling my heart. As I drove to the Memory Care center I kept thanking God that He took Dad the way He did.

I stayed with my Dad and talked with him. I kissed his forehead and held his hands. I remembered. I smiled. I prayed. I was present.

A few years ago our family started Memory Jars. When we had a life event we wanted to always remember we put a memento in our Memory Jar. Then each Thanksgiving morning I pull everything out and sift through the memories to be thankful.

Going through my Memory Jar this morning I found tickets to TU football games. LOTS of tickets to TU football games with my Dad. The first game we went to when I moved back to Tulsa from North Carolina; TU vs. Boise State, we lost. The last TU game we went to was TU vs. UTSA in November 2013.

I have also kept handwritten notes from my Dad. I got T-boned in a parking lot and he left a note saying, “I fix cars cheap – call me! BWF” Another one, “Thanks for the cold Pepsi! Such a large Pepsi!”

My Dad suffered from dementia, he was a paint and body man for many years. He still recognized us when we visited but couldn’t remember our names. I could be his wife, daughter or mother on any given day. He kept his sense of humor. Whenever one of the residents would rant and rave, he would look at them, shake his head and say, “She’s nuts.”

Each time I visited him before I left I asked him if I could pray for him.  He would say, “Why sure,” most of the time.  The last time I asked him if I could pray, he bowed his head and I prayed, “Father keep him safe and take him when You’re ready.” Then he clapped his hands and patted my cheek.

For the last month or so, he loved to sit in his wheelchair in front of a glass door in the TV room. The sun would be brightly shining and he would shade his eyes and watch the cars go by.

Last Saturday we were delivering turkeys to families and one family lived behind the nursing home where Dad was. As I approached I told the volunteers with me, “We’re gonna drive by a door and my Dad will be sitting there…so we need to wave!”

They didn’t believe me.

We rounded the corner and there was Dad. We waved and laughed and smiled and he saw us. Oh the joy on his face! He waved with both hands, squinted, covered his eyes, waved and smiled and bounced…I could hear his laughter in my heart. We made our delivery and they said, “You have to drive by your Dad again.” I did and my Dad was waving with gusto! So were we.

So much to be thankful for. 

I believe with every death is a new beginning. Today when you sit around your dinner table…look at everyone there and look into your heart. Does your family need forgiveness? Do you need to wrap your arms around someone and tell them that you love them? Are you taking your life for granted?

Tomorrow is not promised.

Is it time you shared your testimony to proclaim what Jesus has done in your life? Does your heart have a God shaped void in it? Now is the time for new beginnings.

I stayed by my Dad’s bedside waiting on the cremation society to come get him. Staff came in to hug my neck and I kept wondering, how do I do this? How do I lose my Dad?

Then God reminded me, each time we have an emergency at the clinic – I walk beside the person until an ambulance takes them away. He said, “Walk with him.”  So I did. I walked behind the gurney that held my Dad all the way to the hearse. It was 6:39am when I said good-bye one last time.

“Give thanks to the Lord…Glory in His holy name; let the hearts of those who seek the Lord rejoice!” 1 Chronicles 16: 8,10

Our family will gather in the spring to take a fishing trip to remember him and spread his ashes.  We are going to honor his memory by establishing an annual event through my ministry, Isaiah 58, In His service. Maybe by providing a day of fishing to underprivileged kids, he would love that since he taught his daughters and grandsons how to fish! All memorials given to Isaiah 58, In His service  PO Box 521063  Tulsa OK 74152 will go towards this event.

In His service, deni