National Social Work Month - Being Present

Empathy.

She stutters when she gets upset. She wanted to tell me why she was so upset but she was struggling to calm down. She took some breaths. I gave her some water. Reminded her we were not in a hurry and to take her time. She closed her eyes. When she opened her eyes she was crying.  She loves to knit. She had almost finished a blanket when her sister came to visit with her dog. The dog destroyed the blanket. She was crushed. Her sister said nothing. No, `too bad’. No, `I’m sorry’. Not even a `bad dog.’ Her sister scooped up her dog and left. She sat there feeling 45 years of hurt emotions all at once. She needed to get it out. She didn’t need me to fix it. She just needed me to be present with her. 

Unbearable pain.

One child died from cancer. One died from a car wreck. One had a heart attack. One died when he put a gun in his mouth and pulled the trigger. She’s a mother with no one left to mother. She hurts so much she can’t breathe. She is distracted. She feels guilty. She has regrets. She’s begging God to take the pain away. She dissolves into sobs in my arms.

Whatever it takes.

The five year old grabs my hand and tells me he’s hungry. He lives with his Mom and his Dad, when Dad’s not in jail. They live in an apartment complex filled with bed bugs, shootings, broken toilets and so far away from basic needs they have to get groceries at a convenience store. Their food stamps are gone in just a couple of visits. But, he’s hungry and we don’t have any funds. I tell him he won’t go to bed hungry tonite. I go home and clean out my freezer and pantry and deliver them.

Bulls eye.

He’s really mad. He’s messed up. He won’t remember tomorrow what a jerk he’s being today. I know that. But, everyone standing around doesn’t.  I talk in a calm and level voice. My goal is to move him away from the person he’s so angry with. However, she’s egging him on, which is not helping. She’s messed up too. After awhile he calms down. The crowd disperses, except her. She takes a big gulp of vodka and leans forward and spits. But, she misses him and hits me in the face. Her expression confirms her mistake and she turns to go quickly in the opposite direction.  My eyes are burning and he is laughing, “So this is how I get you to have a drink with me?”

Driving by.

I was supposed to go to a meeting but I cancelled. I was driving by early in the morning and saw two of my homeless guys. I just bought breakfast which I rarely do. It was really cold outside. Neither one of them were wearing a coat.  I got out and opened my trunk. Two coats, two pairs of socks and two loaded backpacks with gloves, blankets, snacks and stocking caps. I gave them my breakfast and coffee and reminded them they need to share. They gave me toothless smiles and bear hugs. It was the last time I saw Jimmy. So thankful I didn’t drive by, but stopped.

Crisis.

He called me at 11:30pm. He’s ready to kill himself. I go to his apartment and we sit. Eventually he agrees he needs help. I load him into the car and we go to the ER. They call him back and he asks me to go with him. I do. He’s talking mostly about his ex-wife and his son. He misses them. He doesn’t understand why he needs to take his psych meds forever. Why can’t he get better without them? He doesn’t have insurance so at 4am they release him to the streets.  He has no family or support system. The crisis has subsided, this time, for now. But, what about next time…

The Double Whammy.

She was crying, a LOT. But, they handed her to me anyway. I took off my pens and cuddled her on my shoulder. I was going to sing, but that would be bad. I bounced. I walked. I patted. I used my calming voice. She kept crying. Then she stopped. I heard this deep gurgle and then the gates opened wide. She puked all down my back and filled her diaper. I looked at her face. She was smiling.

Advocate.

He was in prison almost 30 years for murder. He cried the first time we met. He was so scared he didn’t know where to begin. He was overwhelmed by his new life. I helped him get a birth certificate and social security card. We got some fines paid off. He got his driver’s license. We got him a flip phone to start. I was a job reference for him. That was almost 3 years ago. Today he’s got a great job, an apartment, new dentures and a girlfriend. Oh and a smart phone.

Home visit.

She could see only shadows. Her cataracts were eating away her vision. I went over to read her mail to her, pay her bills and take her grocery shopping. She waited for almost two years for “the system” to approve her for eye surgery since she doesn’t have insurance. She has diabetes so no surgery until she got her diabetes under control. I sent her to a doctor friend of mine. Her health improved and she went in for surgery. First the left eye and then the right. The last time I saw her she could see my face and told me I don’t look like I sound.  I got a text from her tonite, “Look outside the sunset is amazing!” To God be the glory!

Listening.

She can’t quit crying. Her blood pressure is up. She needs to go to school to pick up her grandson, but she just needs to let it out. She tells me about her failed marriages, her daughter who is a drug addict and sucking her dry; the affairs, the gambling and she is worried she stinks because she hasn’t showered in 3 days, “They cut off the water.”  She took her car in for repairs and the estimate and total amount due weren’t even close. “So, I guess he’ll keep my car.” After 45 minutes, she wasn’t perspiring anymore and her cheeks weren’t bright red. She was much calmer. “You asked me if there was something I could be thankful for today. You. It’s you. I needed someone to listen and you did. Thank you.”

When you give to Isaiah 58, In His service you touch many lives in our community. You won’t hear about it on the TV or read about it in the paper. But, quietly, faithfully, with perseverance and thankfulness Isaiah 58, In His service loves on the underdogs that are missed, forgotten, overlooked, mistreated and hurting unimaginable hurts.

March is National Social Work month. I am a Social Worker; licensed, degreed and certified.  I bear witness that God can change lives. I am hopeful and will not give up. I love God’s calling on my life! I am a child of God and am so thankful to serve a compassionate and loving God!!

Know that you are prayed for.  Thank you!

In His service,

deni A. fholer, BSW, MSW, LMSW, CCFP

president / executive director

Isaiah 58, In His service, Inc.

Let my Heart Overflow

Over the last six months I have had a number of young people, in their 20’s come talk to me because of fear. Some were having panic attacks and some were waking up in the middle of the night, sweating from nightmares.

One young lady sat on the edge of the chair, clutching her backpack and as tears flowed she said, “What if this is it, I mean the end. What if I never get  married? Or have kids? I can’t relax or get the thoughts in my head to slow down.” She sobbed.

These young people weren’t my usual peeps. They were well dressed; going to college, driving their own car, well connected because Mom and Dad are from the middle class. They have life goals and are motivated.  But the instability of the world was closing in on them and they became terrified. TV, radio, newspaper, Internet – they were overwhelmed by what they were watching and reading.

Be choosy by what you absorb. We should be cautious about what we watch on TV, what news we read in the paper and what we see on the internet. We should be intentional to take in inspiration, hope and love so we can give inspiration, hope and love.

So many people I talk to confess that their Christian example is flushed down the toilet when they’re behind the wheel of a car. What is it that tics us off when someone ignores a red light, throws us the finger when they pass us going 15 MPH over the speed limit, honk when we don’t floor the gas pedal when the light turns green.

It's a bummer that many of these folks feel their blood pressure rise as they drive to work in the morning and their anger and bad attitude drips off them and rubs off on all their coworkers. Do you watch or listen to stories in the morning that sets your day up for failure?

Or do you lift up your morning commute to the Father before you walk out the door? Are you Bible searching for verses to recite when you encounter an early morning or late afternoon idiot driver?

Are you looking for God moments? Do you ask the Father to bring to your attention the good, the blessed and the thankful throughout your day? It’s humbling and empowering.

In line at a McDonalds. Two cars in front of me was a Mercedes. The car in front of me was an old clunker. The driver was young and as she pulled up to pay, her hands were filled with change. But, the employee said her meal had been paid for and she pointed to the Mercedes. The young driver became ecstatic and bounced in her seat, change dropping as she waved at the driver of the Mercedes.

Sitting at a signal light. Next to me was a landscape truck and trailer. Crossing in front of us was a senior man in a wheelchair. He was alone and working hard to cross the street pushing with his one foot. I heard one of the guys in the truck speak Spanish as he pointed. Then he got out of the truck and rushed to push the man safely to the sidewalk.

Driving our Comanche kids to church one morning we passed a highway exit that always has a homeless person sitting there flying a sign. As we crossed the railroad tracks we saw a KOTV news truck parked on the other side of the road. The driver was walking towards the homeless man with a bag and drink from a local fast food restaurant.

A mentally ill friend who struggles daily to remain in reality also happens to have the biggest heart of anyone I know. She called to tell me she made it through the end of the month with money left over. She cares for many of the senior ladies in her apartment complex. One of her grannies needed some groceries so my friend bought and delivered them. She wanted to be sure I knew she saved Isaiah 58, In His service money because she didn’t have to ask us for help. “God told me to do it, so I said ‘yes Sir’ and it made my heart overflow.’”

Last Sunday Pastor Alex finished his sermon series called Endzone. The series talked about finances, 10-10-80. Tithe 10%, save 10% and use the 80% to pay your monthly bills. To those of us in debt <house and car excluded> he said, “By being in debt you’re telling God that His provision isn’t enough.” Ouch, the truth can hurt.

He ended the series with an illustration. He talked about a junior in high school, “God got his heart last summer.” Pastor said the young man hadn’t missed one Sunday since God got him. He said the young man drove his car to the family vacation in Texas so he could come back to attend church on Sunday since the family wouldn’t be returning. He told how the young man is an athlete and began a Bible study with his teammates. He also told Pastor Alex that he is saving to go to Egypt on a mission trip, but he hadn’t received much financial support.

Pastor Alex said God put on his heart to pass the offering buckets in all of the Churchat. locations to cover the cost of the young man’s mission trip. He asked us to give $1.00. He said some of us may be giving for the first time and others may give much more. He said any money received over and above the cost of the mission trip will be put in an account for the young man to use as he serves our amazing God!!

Feel inspired? Exciting isn't it? Now ask God to help you pay attention. Ask Him to show you opportunities for you to love someone until your heart overflows. Ready. Set. Go.

Know that you are prayed for.

In His service, d

12th Annual Holiday Helping Hands Project - Love You More

“Are you ready to be adventurous?”

“Aunt deni, you’re not gonna make me get on top of the van are you?”

“Maybe later. See that lady at the bus stop? How about grabbing a blessing bag and wish her a Merry Christmas?”

His face lit up. He grabbed a bag and holding it out, he walked up to her. Her hands covered her mouth and then she wrapped her arms around him. I could hear her saying, “Thank you, Merry Christmas.” He was beaming when he got back into the van.

So, my 14 year old nephew and I drove around Tulsa delivering Christmas gifts to some of the 36 individuals and families we adopted for our 12^th annual Holiday Helping Hands Project. And along the way he gave blessing bags to lots of folks. It was amazing. This was the Friday before Christmas. This year was like no other.

On November 28^th we had $26.75 in our bank account. I reminded God that we were all in and He was not a God of disappointment and we had an upcoming deadline for one crusty ol’ guy that we had been loving on. I went to the post office after work expecting a gift.

It wasn’t there.

Okay, what have I missed? We made a promise that we would keep, but how? ‘God, who were you nudging to give to us, who isn’t listening? Will you nudge them harder…I promised we’d pay this bill.’ My eyes filled with tears, as I looked at my checkbook sitting on the passenger seat. Oh, wow am I slow. ME, you’re nudging ME. It was Wednesday and I was getting paid on Friday. I wrote the check. We paid the debt for the individual and I still had money in my account when I got that Friday paycheck. Praise Jesus!

All of our folks had been adopted except for 16 families, which meant the ministry would buy for them. We made two deposits on the 16^th for a total of $1400 and we received a check for $2,000 on the 17^th. Awesome!!! Everyone would be covered. In fact we adopted three more families the week of Christmas!

Don, a senior friend, who our family adopted two decades ago, wasn’t feeling well and refused to go to the hospital. A doctor friend of mine came to see him on Sunday and told me, “He’s dying.” I took a deep breath and we began to put a plan together and I went back to Don’s bedroom where he had been the past few days. I guess I had “that look” on my face because he reminded me, “I’m not gone yet, but you know I’m ready.” Monday he agreed to call an ambulance.

When EMSA arrived all were surprised to hear one of the paramedics say, “Oh, wow, I knew I’d been here before, hey man, I read your book!!” Don has written four books, which he proceeded to clarify. God knew exactly what he needed, and a book boost was it. Don was admitted with pneumonia on Monday night.

Tuesday morning at work, I received a call from my sister telling me that my mother had taken a turn for the worse. It was agreed to call in Hospice. I sensed I needed to be with Mom, but we had promised to pay an insurance premium for a man so he could have surgery that was scheduled in two days. I got a call from the hospital telling me his insurance had been cancelled. I called his employer and she said, “I can’t reinstate his insurance until the first month is paid for.” I had mailed the payment two days earlier, but it wouldn’t get to her in time. I told her I was on my way.

I gave her a check and told her when she receives the one I mailed to apply it to January’s payment. Then I jumped on 169 and drove to Mom’s nursing home. As afternoon turned to evening, we were all gathered at her bedside telling her good-bye. But, she rallied. “Love you Mom.” She smiled and said, “Love you more,” her signature reply each time we told her we love her.

When I got home I had a number of messages on my phone. One was Don’s doctor from the hospital. She said that they had called a code and revived him. I was his health care proxy and I reminded the doctor he was ready to leave this earth and go to glory. We agreed to put him on comfort care the same day we put my Mom on Hospice.

Wednesday, Mom continued to rally and eating toast, bacon and strawberry jam. So, I headed up to the hospital. I walked into the room to find a doctor talking to a nurse. I told him who I was and I confirmed that Don did not want extraordinary measures to keep him alive. I was on one side of the bed and the doctor was on the other. Tears began to flow as I talked to the doctor. Don reached up and put his hand on my cheek. The doctor looked at Don and said, “Are you ready to go see Jesus?” Don’s face beamed and he said, “JJJeeesssuuusss! Dooollllyyy!” His Savior and his wife who died long ago; he was ready.

His breakfast came and he ate with gusto. But, by lunch time he didn’t want a tray, but something else, “Brraauuuum’s” and he held up 3 fingers. I smiled, “You want Braum’s Neapolitan ice cream?” He smiled. Off I went. I came back with a full cup of ice cream. He ate every bite without opening his eyes once.

The professional part of me was locked into Social Work mode but the personal side was clinging to the robe of Jesus. Where did I need to be? With Mom? With Don? Buying and wrapping gifts? As God has always done for me, He comforted me, encouraged me and reminded me He’s got this - through music. Which is ironic if you’ve ever heard me sing.

Each time I got into my car, for a whole month, God played the song I needed exactly when I needed to hear it. “Breath of heaven, Hold me together, Be forever near me,
Breath of heaven, Breath of heaven, Lighten my darkness, Pour over me your holiness, For you are holy, Breath of heaven, Do you wonder as you watch my face, If a wiser one should have had my place, But I offer all I am, For the mercy of your plan, Help me be strong, Help me be, Help me.” Breath of Heaven - Amy Grant.

I trusted Him. I believed He would get me where I needed to be, when I needed to be there, but I prayed my free will wouldn’t get in His way. I got up early on Thursday morning and headed to Wal-Mart. I finished buying for our families. Then I headed to the hospital. Shortly thereafter my sister came up. By this time Don was one step closer to seeing his Savior…

I was going to leave for a few minutes; I picked up my coat and in walked a friend of Don’s. So I put my coat down. After he left, Elaine was going to leave, but housekeeping mopped the floor, so she decided to wait until the floor dried. We were alone with him. His breathing changed and his breaths became softer and further apart. I held his hand and we watched him take his last breath. It was 2:30pm.

God kept us with him. Calls were received and decisions were made. I texted his life group, Luke 10, to tell them he was finally home. A dear friend of mine came to the hospital with a Café Latte in hand. Before his body was removed, we were prayed for by one of the owners of the funeral home.

Mom was still rallying so I went home and finished wrapping and bagging gifts. Friday my nephew and I played Santa. We had delivered to everyone we promised to. A widow and Veteran, a family whose Dad had lost his job, a family that had been homeless for a year and just got housing, a boy who recently lost his Dad, a senior with dementia, a woman who recently had cataract surgery and could see for the first time in years, two homeless women, a homeless man, a grandpa raising his granddaughter, a Mom whose boyfriend abandoned her, two women struggling with depression, a man who has lost four jobs this year, a single Mom and her three kids, a Mom and adult daughter who both have serious health conditions, a woman who lives in a nursing home and has never had any family visit, a Grandma who lives with her daughter who struggles with mental illness, a woman trapped in her home due to hoarding, a Mom and Dad who are intellectually challenged. Each family and individual we give to are divinely guided to us. We ask for Christmas lists and promise they will be wrapped and delivered before Santa comes down the chimney on Christmas Eve. For 12 years we have fulfilled that promise, with God’s help and dedicated donors.

The week after Christmas we met with the funeral home, informed Don’s family of his passing, his friends and I wrote his obituary, in it we invited people to call for a Bible and prayer, and it was in the Tulsa World on December 28^th, his 93^rd birthday, the same day of his visitation.

January 1st it was freezing cold outside. As I was driving to church I saw one of my homeless guys. A gentle spirit. We have been loving on him for almost 7 years. He served in the National Guard but landed in the streets after his wife died. I pulled over and invited him into the van. He was so cold he couldn’t speak. I took him to church and gave him about 4 cups of coffee and some cocoa. He eventually warmed up and said he was hungry so I took him to McDonald’s. Then I drove him back to his friend’s house and strongly encouraged him to stay inside. “Don’t worry about me little sis.” It was the last time I saw him alive. He died on January 5^th at the age of 56.

The following Thursday my Mom began declining. This time there would be no rally to follow. She died early on Monday morning, January 9^th. Three weeks from the day we put Mom and Don on Hospice, they were both in Heaven.

The day after Mom died I was invited to the first, You Are Special transitional house. About 11 of us gathered in this newly remodeled home. We sang songs. We prayed. We talked about why God had brought us together. We listened to the testimony of a young couple, who were drowning in drugs and sin, yet Jesus reached out to them in miraculous ways. What God is doing in their lives is powerful. They are the beginning of the end of generational sin in their families.

Most everyone in the room had known Jesus but confessed of turning our backs on Him and then repenting time and time again. But, the message that resonated was that all the times before, we weren’t serious. We still believed we could be the servant God called us to be by trying harder. Only until we fall on our faces at the feet of Jesus and surrender every single piece of us to Him; only then can He truly use us. Only then can we be a part of the miraculous. It was the rawness of the surrender in the room that welcomed Jesus. I was exactly where I needed to be, so thankful.

God will give us more than we can bear. He did me. He gave me way much more than I could handle this past month. He wants us to need Him and Him alone. In my own strength I would have crashed and burned early on. But, because I confessed to Him that I had no idea how to be at three places at once, the needs were too big and I was exhausted and I had nothing, not a drop left. It was then that I surrendered. I cried out to Him to lead wholly and completely. He quietly picked me up and carried me to the other side. He got me where He needed me to be because I wasn’t fighting Him, I was holding onto Him with both hands.

Now that I look back over the past month, I am humbled by His love. Love that was evident in the kindness of others, of subtle gestures, of His mercy and grace and impeccable timing. He is teaching me that He really does love us, that much. That if you were the only person on earth, He would still have sent His son to die for you. I hope that sinks in.

After the time of fellowship on Tuesday evening, I got in the car and turned on the radio, “,Your love is my armor, I fear no evil, Darkness runs from Your light, So I won’t be afraid, I won't be afraid, You’re going before me and oceans are parting, You’re fighting my battles, When my feet are failing and my heart is shaking, You’re fighting my battles, Time after time, You’re my refuge, You heal every scar, You’re guarding my heart, Your promise, the hope that I cling to, My rescue, my friend, You come rushing in.” Battles – The Afters

I am filled to overflowing and I can’t see what I’m writing because of thankful tears. Know that each of you who chooses to love on our families and folks mean so much! Each of you who bought gifts, sent a check, donated turkeys and clothes and backpacks, a Christmas tree, prayers, bikes and blessing bags touched lives for Jesus. Thank you for being obedient to the nudgings of Jesus!! Thank you to those who loved on me this month. Each prayer was savored and answered.

Know that you are prayed for. May you surrender all.

In His service, deni

We can do more. We can do better.

“I thank my God every time I remember you. In all my prayers for all of you, I always pray with joy because of your partnership in the gospel form the first day until now, being confident of this, that He who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.” Philippians 1:3-6

Don "Smokestack Jack" Shank

Donald “Don” E. Shank Obituary

Donald E. Shank, age 92, passed from this life on December 22, 2016 at St. John Medical Center, Tulsa, OK.

Born December 28, 1923 in Tulsa, OK to Lloyd and Lena Shank. Don was a loving husband, owner of Don Shank and Associates Advertising Agency, an author of four books, and a wonderful friend to many. He was a lifelong member of First Baptist Church Tulsa; he graduated from Central High School and was a University of Tulsa alumnus. Don was an honorable WWII veteran who loved his country. He served in the U.S. Army Air Corps, and was stationed in Italy during the war from 1943-1945. He received the European-African-Middle Eastern with 2 Bronze Battle Stars, Good Conduct Medal and 3 Overseas Bars.

Don was preceded in death by his parents, Lloyd and Lena Shank, his three brothers, Max, Howard and Wayne “Linx” Shank and Dolly Jane, his wife of 42 years. Don and Dolly had no children.

He is survived by nieces, nephews and cousins. He also leaves behind many friends, Marilyn Inhofe Davis, Jack Pirtle, Sara Lytle, Doris Fholer and her family, his beloved Luke 10 Life Group, and his closest friends and caregivers, William McWilliams, Roseanne Yoakum and Deni Fholer.

Don’s relationship with Jesus was the most important part of his life. Daily he would tell friends about talks he had with Jesus and he lived for opportunities to share his faith and minister with Deni in the community.

John 3:16 says, “For God so loved the world that He gave His one and only Son, that whoever believes in Him, will not perish but have eternal life.” This is Don’s prayer for you. If you sense that your life is missing something, if your loneliness and despair cannot be filled by the things of this life, it is time to come to Jesus. Call 918-260-1933, prayer and a Bible are waiting for you.

Don was adamant about not having a funeral. A visitation will be held on Wednesday, December 28, 2016 (his birthday) at Dillon Marler Dighton Funeral Home, 1200 N. Cleveland Ave., Sand Springs, OK 74063, from 3pm to 7pm.

In lieu of flowers, donations may be made to: Isaiah 58, In His Service, Inc. PO Box 521063, Tulsa, OK 74152. 918-260-1933.

Christ of Christmas!

"Jesus came into the world to save all kinds of people; rich or poor, black or white, educated or illiterate, sophisticated or ordinary - or anyone in between. Only two groups of people gathered at God's invitation to pay Him homage when He was born. One was the shepherds - lowly, at the bottom of the social ladder, uneducated, unsophisticated. The other was the wise men - intellectuals, from another race and country, wealthy, respected. The two groups could hardly have been more different! God brought both groups to Bethlehem - one by an angelic announcement, one by the appearance of a miraculous star.  And by bringing both, God was telling us that Jesus is the Savior for EVERYONE! Every person stands in need of His forgiveness and new life - and every person can know it, if he or she only repents and makes that journey to the Christ of Christmas. No matter who you are in the eyes of others, you need Christ. And no matter what you have done, He loves you and stands ready to welcome you." Hope for Each Day by Billy Graham

Feeling Thankful!

He sits on an upside down pickle bucket sometimes 10 hours a day. His beard was long and scruffy until he asked a "little hair cutter" to trim it. "She said oh-oh, well now I'm almost a clean shaven man." He smiled and rubbed his chin.

He's wearing the same coveralls he's worn for weeks. Says he's worked the new out of 'em. He'll take a shirt or a pair of socks now and then, but doesn't like the clutter, sides somebody will steal the extra.

I met him at the Cricket store a few weeks ago. He had a phone and a couple dollars but he drank one too many and talked about havin' a phone...woke up the next day, no phone, no bucks. So we got a phone that talks to him, and I programmed contacts for him.

He's got cataracts. He sees only shadows with a little color. He can't remember how long it's been since he could see someone's features or read a newspaper. He crosses a major street by judging the distance of the cars by sound. “Been hit by a car four times, keep hittin’ me on the left side, I keep thinkin’ I should back off the curb and get hit on the right side, kind of even things out.”

We’re praying for eye surgery soon. He's really hopeful! He dreams about seeing the hot dog and all the fixins' before he bites into it.
Feeling thankful.

I called him today. He answered the phone! Asked him if he likes BBQ, "who doesn't in Oklahoma!" I drove over and stopped across the street. "Little sister, is that you?" We hugged; just a whiff of alcohol and it’s late in the day.

I bagged some sandwiches and chips. He said he would be seein' more guys later and yeah they'd love some sandwiches. I loaded him up.

He never flies a sign, cause he doesn't want to be arrested and taken out of his comfort zone. He sits on the bucket and he climbs into the hearts of others like he did mine, and he always gets just enough manna each day.

He asked for a Gatorade. I suck, forgot drinks. I gave him 5 bucks and reminded him it's God’s money. He held me tight as I asked God to protect him, to remind him that something better is coming, to please let him see again. He patted my cheek and headed into the QT.

If you made a list of all the things you could be thankful for, the list would undoubtedly be longer than your misfortunes. Unknown

“Deni it’s getting cold and she’s sitting at that bus stop every morning, why won’t she go to a shelter?” A caring friend has been asking me to check on this lady for over a week.

I finally made it.  She was sitting there with holes in her tennis shoes, smoking every last leaf of tobacco out of her hand rolled cigarette. Her hands are stained from tobacco. She asks me a lot of questions she wants to be sure I’m legit. A bag sits at her feet and she’s wrapped in a stained and soiled blanket.

She tells me she’s at that bus stop every morning, “And it sure is tough to try to make it without a cup of coffee.” Coffee. Just like that she had climbed into my heart…

I go by and check on her and work at breaking her barrier of life events that haunt her and keep her chained to that life on a bus stop bench. I asked her if she had any other shoes, “Why? Yours look fine.” She eventually told me she would love a pair of boots…and toenail clippers. “I can’t get pedicures and manicures much in my line of work.” She smiled.  I told her about Isaiah 58, In His service. I told her we don’t ask for funds, we don’t do fundraisers, but we pray and God provides through the coolest of ways. She cocked her head and insinuated there was room on the bench for me, “How can you help and not ask people for money?”

We had about $30 in our bank account. But, I prayed and told her I knew God wanted her to have some boots and toenail clippers and He would provide. The next day we received a donation through Your Cause. Your Cause is an online platform for corporations to manage one or multiple philanthropic programs including employee matching gifts and volunteer grant programs.  An individual who works for AT&T made a donation and AT&T matched their gift. Pretty cool! God gave boot money!

Two days later I showed up with a brand new pair of boots, some socks and a complete toenail kit. She started to smile broadly, but noticed I was looking at her and she said, “They probably won’t fit.” I told her I’d take them back and get another size.

They fit!

Gratitude unlocks the fullness of life. It turns what we have into enough, and more. It turns denial into acceptance, chaos to order, confusion to clarity. It can turn a meal into a feast, a house into a home, a stranger into a friend. – Melodie Beattie

November 24^th, 2016, Thanksgiving, the one year anniversary of my Dad’s death. I didn’t want this day we stop and take time to thank God for our amazing blessings, to be about me. I prayed about serving Him today. So, I made some phone calls….

God had put a handful of people on my heart to see if they would like to go out for a Thanksgiving meal with us. But, each one I talked to said, “No thank you,” except one. The reasons were varied, one was finally invited to his sister’s house and he wasn’t going to miss it, one had just lost her job and her cousin invited her over, another said no because she is agoraphobic and the thought of going out in public almost pushed her into a panic attack.

God put these people on my heart for a reason. The plan wasn’t mine, it was His, I just needed to pay attention and listen to Him.

When I told the lady who said “yes” it was just going to be her and I she was relieved. Her life has been filled with trauma and she too was anxious about eating with strangers. So, we went to Village Inn and she had a turkey and dressing dinner. All of her children live out of state, so she would have been alone in her apartment with her cats –all day. She told me some amazing life events and scolded me for not having a pet. We talked about God and church and she’s agreed to go with me, “Sometime.”  We gave her The Flower Man by Mark Ludy and an advent devotional by Janet Denison and an envelope that I asked her not to open until she got home.

As soon as she got home, she opened the envelope and immediately called me in tears, saying, “Thank you, thank you, thank you.” We put two $20 bills in the envelope. She is a senior adult who lives alone on a fixed income. She drives, but only to the store because she can’t afford the gas to go much further. She never has pocket change or a few extra dollars in her billfold. Often she has called me because her electricity is going to be cut off or she needs groceries. She’s exhausted most of the ministries and agencies that provide groceries because most of them put limits on how often she can get food. She had to have work done on her car and she needed help with groceries for three months in a row and Isaiah 58, In His service provided each time because we don’t set limits and God provided the funds.

She told me she was going to put gas in her car and go to a park on the other side of town that she loves, “Just to sit and feel the sun on my face.”

Feeling Thankful.

At times our own light goes out and is rekindled by a spark from another person. Each of us has cause to think with deep gratitude of those who have lighted the flame within us. Albert Schweitzer

I couldn’t get the woman out of my mind, she’s all alone at home and too afraid to go out and get a Thanksgiving meal.

I circled around and went back to Village Inn and bought five turkey and dressing holiday meals complete with pumpkin pie!!  I drove over to her house and knocked on the door. She wasn’t going to open it. I told her who I was and promised not to come inside but wanted to give her something. She cracked the door open and looked at the bag in my hand. “Happy Thanksgiving, I’m praying for you.” She smiled and said thank you as I passed the bag to her!!

I showed up at the home of a hoarder who hasn’t been able to cook on her stove for years and has agreed to let Isaiah 58, In His service help to slowly and carefully start cleaning out her home. She said she was trying to microwave something and burned it up…

Then to the home of two alcoholics; got there just as they started drinking, nothing better than a vodka kiss on the cheek…

Then to a senior who lives alone with numerous dogs. He saw me coming and ran outside barefooted. “I was thinkin’ you might be comin’ by with some daily bread…is there pie in that bag?” You bet.

I write about the power of trying, because I want to be okay with failing. I write about generosity because I battle selfishness. I write about joy because I know sorrow. I write about faith because I almost lost mine, and I know what it is to be broken and in need of redemption. I write about gratitude because I am thankful - for all of it. - Kristin Armstrong

As love and thankfulness for our family and friends is essential, I pray too that your heart is big enough to reach out to our neighbors who struggle each day to get to work, feed their family, get medicine without insurance and suffer from loneliness and hopelessness.

Isaiah 58, In His service tries to love on those God brings to us with quiet actions filled with compassion. With the hope of showing the character of Jesus through tangible ways so prayerfully they will begin a personal relationship with Him.

The 12^th annual Holiday Helping Hands Project has begun! We have a handful of families so far, that we will love on this Christmas. If you would like to buy gifts, wrap and deliver; buy gifts and give to us to deliver or provide gifts we welcome your “thanks-giving” with open arms.

If you purchase gifts on Amazon, go to Amazon.smile and plug in Isaiah 58, In His service and we will be blessed by your giving!

“…We have not stopped praying for you and asking God to fill you with the knowledge of His will through all spiritual wisdom and understanding. And we pray this in order that you may live a life worthy of the Lord and may please Him in every way: bearing fruit in every good work, growing in the knowledge of God, being strengthened with all power according to His glorious might so that you may have great endurance and patience, and joyfully giving thanks to the Father, who has qualified you to share in the inheritance of the saints in the kingdom of light. Colossians 1:9-12

Feeling thankful for each of you who pray for us, give to us financially or in gifts in kind. Know that you are prayed for.

In His service,

deni A. fholer

The Curse has been lifted!

The curse has been lifted!!!

This was the CNN alert I found on my phone after game 7 of the World Series. I am a baseball fan; both of my nephews play baseball. In fact earlier in the evening I was running between fields watching them play. My youngest, Pancake, was hoofing it toward third and did this funky Ninja move to escape being tagged…SAFE!! AND….he hit an in park homerun!!! Yaroooooggaa!! My oldest nephew, H has become quite the pitcher, 6 strike outs!

I was psyched! I wanted to high five everyone; do fist bumps and shoulder bumps. On the way home, I turned the radio up and made a really joyful noise to the Lord, it was okay that He probably had earplugs in…

It was the idea that even though I wasn’t playing, I was so thankful that they were doing so well and I wanted them to know…I was one proud Aunt!

By the time I got home, I was hopeful and filled with anticipation. Maybe, just maybe the Cubs would win it all!! I turned the TV on and they were ahead, I mean really ahead. I just went to the kitchen for a cup of coffee and holy Toledo it was tied!!

My heart was beating too fast…and I couldn’t sit still. I got up and moved around the house, piddling…then I turned the sound off and sort of sneaked by the TV to see what was happening.

I got on the computer and pulled up the play by play account of the game. It was still tied and the feed stopped. THEY CAN’T END A WORLD SERIES IN A TIE, what the heck….RAIN DELAY..ughh, are you kidding??

It hit me I was getting up really early the next morning so I jumped in bed, pulled the covers over my head and thought how goofy I was to be so completely engulfed in the contagion of a baseball game.

So as I tried to quiet my mind, I thought of the stories I had read about the Cubs. The last World Series was won in 1908. A 108 year old woman had been a fan for A CENTURY and was confident that she was going to finally witness THE win. The Cubs Chaplain was a baseball player for MSU in his youth and later in life he was asked to be the Cubs Chaplain, he said, “It was while I was on the field — and I had tears in my eyes — that it really became clear that God was saying, ‘This was your dream but now you’re living mine.’ I had this small plan. God wanted me to be a priest and stay in baseball, which has been so humbling.'” Then there was that infamous goat curse…

A little after 1am I picked up my phone and saw the score, 8-7, they won!!! I was so excited for them. I’ve never been to Wrigley field; I doubt that I watched any of their games over the season until the World Series. But, there was that deep seated need to root for the underdog, come on God, let ‘em win. It just felt right that they finally won. Good stuff.

As I was replaying the TV coverage in my head, wow did you see the fans? I mean, they were holding on tightly to each other, their hands clasped in front of their mouths, Dad’s holding their kids, faces in buried in shoulders…and some were praying! This was serious and for a while, nothing else mattered…the focus was forward of what could happen.

On Facebook were pictures of Cubs ball caps, fans in T-shirts, parents and kids at home watching the game together, incredible joy on people’s faces.

What I noticed was a large number of people all praying for the same outcome, for the same team. And then it happened.

We so needed this.

See? We can be united. Even some Cleveland fans commented that it was okay that the Cubs won…not good, but okay, being gracious in defeat, a lesson for us all.

For 7 games we put politics aside and we came together. I liked the way it made me feel. Even though I was anxious, nerve wracked and pacing, it was the possibility that wow, finally after 108 years, this could really happen, and wouldn’t that just be the best thing ever.  Something really really good could happen.

Come Wednesday morning when your team wins, be humble. When your team loses be gracious. How we treat each other is so much more important than a trophy. Remember, you are an example to every child you are around.

Bury the hate. Ask the Father to fill your heart with love and respect and ask Him to fill your mind with possibilities of making a positive difference right here, right now where we live. Then take action.

No matter who is elected, the concerns and needs that we go to bed with on Tuesday night will still be there on Wednesday morning. So take all of that adrenaline, excitement and victory from the game and turn it into good works.

Remember, the curse has been lifted…Jesus won!

In His service, deni